Actions & Consequences

Sorry sweety, i shouldn't have quoted you 'cause you took it as a personal response, naturally. I was taking the chance to add a couple of general points or more.

People, don't take me wrong for my tone. But the fact that an individual 'cause all this upset and bitter feelings around an otherwise warm family which i honestly love (you've already seen my cheesy topic about it) has 'caused me lots of turmoil, in a day which hasn't been my best either (too much work, very tense atmosphere at the college where i teach today, endless hours of video that awaits my montage, etc etc, and topping that, not only i have to be bitter against people i honestly appreciate the outmost, but also need to thrown so much effort and time into an IDIOTIC person's actions, and stupid things like this which we shouldn't even bother with, normally.

Baby I was teasing you. I know it was not a response to me even though I obviously triggered it. I know about difficult days at work and I can understand you annoyance on today's event. So please do me a favour and relax and call it a day on that matter ok? I was a strange day to all of as and surely to the mods a bit more. No bitterness about anything.

Stavi teasing me = me, in absolutely :heaven:

I thought I did, but I'm ready to learn anything new.

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!









:faint:

HOT MOMMA!


Mother i'd say, but HOT for sure!



aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!! :fainting again just with the thought!:

Ralph, it's not the first time that a Canadian reacts vehemently to being called an American. In Great Britain it's offensive to call a Scotsman a Brit (you fucking Brit is a very HARD offense, from what I've heard from a Scottish girl who actually was in a heated argument regarding this issue on a chat). For us, calling Germans Europeans wouldn't be offensive, but I guess we could compare it to Dan Quayle regretting not knowing Latin so he could understand people in Latin America...

I was out all day and I haven't seen Sunil's last post, which I guess led to his ban. My observation of certain discussions lead to me noticing that there are some sentiments on this board, like Erik and Ralph definitely NOT liking themselves (and this personal lack of sympathy leads to the heat of the discussions), but I would say that calling Erik a troll a big overstatement and rather offensive one. Everybody should learn to back off sometimes, which is pretty hard to do, because film score discussions regard something we have a rather personal and emotional connection to. I wouldn't want to imagine what would happen if somebody called Vaughan Williams a hack and Timmer or Steven responded to that.

The emotionality of the discussion is, I must say, a value, but also may go beyond control, it's something we all have to learn to control it. I definitely did. I had my fair share of trolling few years before I hit this board. Polish film score review community for a long time wasn't the "best" there was. In the times when I had a small personal review site (a non-existing institution now in Poland), and also, those were the times when I started to study on the uni and had classes in grammar and orthographical correctness, we and a couple of friends had a rather bad opinion of the biggest review site there was. In four people, three of them (myself included) being minor website owners, we decided to start our own project. The biggest review site then was a pioneer in the way it was dealt with, it had 7-8 regularly writing reviewers, biographies. They reviews back then didn't have the biggest level, lots of style mistakes, some major blunders like using a word for a celtic guitar to describe bag pipes (a common mistake made by Poles), stuff like that. My friends were rather calm, I started to attack the language rather harsh and rather unfairly ending up with a ban (the ban was very easy to take off, honestly it was just deleting cookies). After those bans and two-three years that passed, I changed. Right now I am trying my best to be a decent and worthy contributor and go with my dreams. I guess, I grew up. I just told you this story, so you know that I am not innocent in these manners.

What about Sunil? Erik, your calling him a troll was bordering on personal attack and while his response was uncalled for, you did provoke him. A troll has a specific internet meaning and to be honest, I think he might have actually know what trolling is. Your use of language is provoking and, honestly, I think that sometimes you tend to enjoy it, especially if you get a response from a guy like Sunil, or even our Ralph. Provoking is a good way to make a point. Maybe it's the way we use the language? I don't know. We are a great community, as showcased by Demetris' wonderful topic on loving the site and our community, but, I guess, we are still learning each other, aren't we?

I wanna know what a withsplash is???

A pun with the word whiplash Tim! Think of it!

I take it you are kidding! But again... stange mood for all of as since yesterday...nay! You can't be angry with me. You are kidding for sure,eh?

Sorry, especially to Stavi, for reopening the can here, but I would like to add something, just to clarify what I meant. (Surprise!)

As a german, I´ve seen the "racist" remark used as a weapon for killing an argument too often to not know how dangerous the remark is. And again, Erik, I don´t think you´re a racist, but ...

When I think about what defines a racist, the first thing that springs to mind is intolerance.

Now, I can easily see how this can be turned around against myself, I will admit that I´m immensely intolerant towards Erik´s sense of humour, so you´re free to call me an Ericist.

But there can be no doubt that Erik´s behaviour towards certain people, certain opinions, or certain aspects of this board is filled with intolerance.

Typically, when asked what started this all he points out Sunil´s remark about Erik being only here to object. The truth is, it started with Erik´s remark that he objects the suggested topic. It was his comment that was uncalled for, that was unsensitive and that opened this.

When I read his "I object" remark, I immediately thought, "Yeah, as usual, thanks for the input." What, for God´s sake, Erik, is so wrong about a topic that someone suggests that you have to object, without ANY hint on why, any explanation what´s wrong about it? You said you we´re joking, but how are we supposed to know that, since I remember fondly your objection against other topics you deemed unworthy or unneccessary, and that wasn´t a joke, so you have to excuse the misunderstanding, if there ever was one.

What I wanted to say, is, I said nothing when you came up with that remark, because I knew what would happen. Sunil, on the other hand, was stupid enough to react (beside the fact that he hit my thoughts exactly). What makes it right to object someone´s wishes for a topic? What makes you think that would be funny? What right do you have to constantly lessen other people´s enjoyment of something?

Yeah, you contribute to this board, and a lot. You never seem to care about the fact that I regularly thanked you for this or that thing you did or wrote, because I really appreciated your effort, maybe because you don´t want MY thanks, or think I´m not meaning it, but that´s not true. I see your level of contribution here, and it´s worth a lot.

But I´m shocked to see that now we´re actually comparing the usefulness of board members. Yeah, of course Sunil is a strange person. And sometimes, his behaviour unsettles the mind. But if there´s one thing I can be sure of, the moment I see Sunil acting strange, all I have to do is wait for Erik to comment.

You´re not a moderator, Erik. What makes you think it´s your task to keep an eye on the guy? To constantly point out when he writes bullshit? We don´t need you for that, we´re old enough to ignore him if he does it all by ourselves. Yes, you are absolutely and without any doubt intolerant towards the guy.

Even IF Sunil is acting like a dick sometimes, it´s not your job to point it out. I had to learn that for myself when I tried to do something about your odd remarks. It wasn´t my job to attack you on your actions. It was the moderators´ (even if they didn´t). Today, I know that, but that doesn´t always keep me from saying something.

You want to apologize if I can prove that you insulted me. You see, that´s the point, you can insult people without meaning it. It´s still an insult. It doesn´t matter what you think makes an insult. If people are hurt by your remarks, it´s you who did it, and not them. It´s your constant excuse, to tell that we´re taking things personal, but constantly taking shots and sideremarks IS personal, whether you see it that way or not. We FEEL attacked, and that´s NOT our problem, because the attack is intentional and in full knowledge about the fact that you KNOW we react on your stuff. And you simply don´t care. Of course you have the right to say what you want. But a well-meaning individual would think again about continuing to hurt people just because he is allowed to.

I apologise to you, Erik, for calling you names. (And without any condition, like you always do when asked to apologize.)

But you are intolerant. You show the signs of a racist, not against a race, but against certain people. That doesn´t make it ANY better. And that´s why I´m so angry about Sunil being banned. He hit the mark. He just didn´t know how (or want) to express it correctly. So we´re banning him for his stupidity.

@ Demetris: And because Erik is the better contributor? I really hope you take that back somewhere down the road.

And this IS the last of it. I hope I managed to express myself in a way that helps to explain my point-of-view without agitating someone enough to re-respond. I know I won´t change anything with it, and I didn´t want to reopen the case. I just didn´t want to leave my racist remarks unexplained.

Sorry, but I strongly object (and there is NO pun whatsoever intended).

There are racists and there are racists. It´s outright dangerous to think real racism has to consist of certain elements like actual force or having people to stitch a star on their shirt or worse.

There are levels of racism, and most of the time, it begins with the dangerous seed of intolerance.

Yes, OF COURSE not everyone intolerant is a racist. But I tried to explain how Sunil might have got the idea how to use the word. I said more than once now that I do not think Erik to be racist in the classic sense. But he shows a certain behaviour towards certain people that has a ... certain quality, and that´s what I tried to point out.

But since I have to accept that we can´t talk about it, I don´t see how I can help Sunil any further.

The other matter, whether Erik wants to discuss his intolerance or not, I have no doubt that he´d love to. The problem is that it won´t change anything at all, because it is not the first time I mention it.

My personal problem right now, however, is that I´m so tired of the whole thing that I find it too hard to continue, because I KNOW it is a waste of time, I´ve written tens of thousands words this week already to finish my book (which I did, BTW), and I´m EMPTY now. So please understand if I take my leave for now, to return with a fresh mind and will at a later time.

Congratulations!

As Erik has already alluded to, he has also butted heads with Steven and Tom.
I'd honestly be hard-pressed to find any common denominator.



I'm not sure what you mean here?
I stated my case (I thought) quite unambiguously, both for banning Sunil, and for not accepting the "racial" connection with regards to Erik. But maybe I misunderstand your point?
I'd be happy to continue that discussion at a later date when you're happy to revisit this.

(I'm also quite happy to leave it. I feel a little exhausted myself.)



Too bad. I'd have loved to know more about the book!

We used to have a book thread on SR.
Now that we have a book writing member here, I think we should have one here too!